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Oh Well
| Monday, July 23 | 0 comments
As much as I admit it was all my fault, I still can't accept the 'solution' that you took.
The 'solution' that you took is akin to lending a helping hand , only to withdraw it back at the last minute. But as time goes by, I thought, "you know what, nevermind, I'll just accept it". And so I did. Told myself that hate gets us nowhere, but when you declared your hate upon me, I still tell myself that "Hey,it's alright, as long as you don't hate, everything will be fine" And I still live to it. As much as I try my best to reconcile with you, at one point of time, you just had to trip on my nerves/ Then again, I told myself, "I did you wrong. So it's alright, I should just try and try again". And so I did, have always done so since we first dated each other. Sure enough, things happen cos of one particular thing I did. Sure enough, I deserve getting all that from you. But yesterday was really. Hais. You didn't have to insinuate that. I'm not that okay. It really hurts that you think I'm so easy. When I'm NOT. Maybe I'm too paranoid. Or too overthinking for that matter. Which leads me to one thing, ever experienced sending someone a whole lot of texts that gives away your inner vulnerability, emotions etc? Get my drift? And the next thing you know he/she doesn't acknowledge it and the next day, treats things like nothing happened at all? YEA. That feeling. It's like you really don't care anymore. Sure you said "I still care for you. Give me time". But in my honest opinion, I gave you alot of time. And yes, I know, it's my fault. I never forget that. Cuba you think again, if the situation is the other way round, You're me and I am you. Surely you would expect me to settle things fast and not leave things hanging right? You wouldn't want me to give you hopes one time, then leave me hanging the next right? No I'm not blaming you my dear, I'm just venting out my emotions. I kindly seek your understanding. Chatted with your mum today. She asked "How are you getting along with Faris?" I can only say "Faris? Err, entah, okay-okay laa. Haha. Kenapa cik?" I can't possibly tell her what I did right, it would make her hate me. I am selfish, I know. But I don't want another person to hate me, hatred from you is more than what I can handle Oh well, what to do. Suck thumb and just stand by the sidelines. Cos in the end the ball's in your court (: |
 Allah Family, Dearest, Friends What more can I ask for? ♥ Designer/codes: AddictedLove Basecodes: Niszke Uzana |
